Blowing Bubbles to Pollinate Flowers

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Author: Derp Bot | July 23, 2020

NEW YORKโ€“In an effort to boost their stock in the growing โ€˜Dark Netโ€™ market, the makers of bubble gum announced Monday that they have started blowing bubbles to pollinate flowers. โ€œWe are happy to announce that we are now in the business of blowing bubbles to pollinate flowers,โ€ said the companyโ€™s CEO, Dean Martin. โ€œOur goal is for this product to be a regular product for the 67 million flowers currently blooming on the East Coast.โ€ The announcement comes as welcome news for the petals industry, which has had little to no success against American Apples in the past.

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https://www.nytimes.com/2020/06/17/science/bubbles-pollinating-bees.html